


Proclaimed Dead (Book 1)

by Plog2580



Series: The Descendants of the Exosea [1]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Abuse, Book 1, Elements, F/M, Family, Fantasy, Female Character of Color, Fiction, LGBTQ Character, Love, M/M, Original Character(s), Original Series, Original Universe, Original work - Freeform, Other, Series, alcoholic, dark themes, diversity, exosea, friends - Freeform, original novel, powers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-29
Updated: 2019-08-01
Packaged: 2020-07-25 01:09:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20024047
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Plog2580/pseuds/Plog2580
Summary: "Time slowed.Milliseconds turned to minutes.Seconds turned to hours.And one minute felt like an eternity.One minute that changed the course of Maxine Walker’s life forever. One minute that looked into her innocent blue eyes and took their virginity. One minute that stole the lives of the two people that she loved most in the world. One minute to say her goodbyes. One minute to remember. And one minute to her eternal suffering."





	1. Prologue

**Wednesday, November 3, 2010**

Abigail wrapped her hand around the cold, crescent-shaped, metal door handle of the front door that belonged to her mother’s olden townhouse; warm light flowed through its widening cracks, its origin coming from beyond the door and releasing itself out as it slowly creaked open—as if she was living in one of those stereotypical horror movie scenes. Although, unlike in those movies, what was beyond the door was nothing of any kind of a horrific state, but her lovely sev—no, eight-year-old daughter, Maxine. From the moment the handle of the front door started to have even the slightest bit of motion Abigail could hear the stomping of little feet on the other side of said door, and when she pushed the handle down all of the way and swung it open—letting all of the bright light from the other side to flow out into the dark night— she was welcomed with her young daughter leaping into her unsuspecting arms.

“Hello birthday girl!” Abigail exclaimed as she lifted the small frame of Maxine and spun her around in the air in circles, just like one of those fluorescent green zero gravity rides that resided in carnival parks and local fairs, well actually probably more like one of those slower swing rides at Cedar Point. “You’re a lot heavier than I remember you being, how much did grandma feed you?”

“Hey!” Maxine replied seeming as if she was offended, as Abigail placed her back down onto the ground. “I do not weigh that much, you’re just weak.”

“Wow, so all of the sudden you just want to bash your own mother, I see what age does to you,” Abigail replied with a smile as she playfully hit her daughter lightly on the shoulder. “Go get your things together, I need to talk to your grandmother for a minute.”

“Okay,” Maxine replied. “She’s in the kitchen.”

“Thanks love,” Abigail replied kissing her on the forehead and motioning for her to get moving. “Now go, you take forever.” 

Abigail watched as Maxine bounced down the nearby hallway, her feet hitting the floor lightly as if she didn’t weigh a thing, and disappeared into the guest room once she reached its dead end. Abigail turned away from the door, of which her daughters' form had just passed through, and stalked towards the kitchen. Her mother was stood at the counter, knife in hand, a little slicing noise cutting through the air just as she sliced a pineapple.

“How’ve you been?” Abigail asked as she neared the thin form of her mother.

Edna looked up at Abigail, her gaze holding a strong, yet chilling glare, “You would know if you would talk to me more than once, maybe twice, a year.”

“You know I can’t,” Abigail said whilst standing right in front of her mother, the granite counter being the only barrier between them. 

“Any why is that?”

“Mom,” Abigail replied quietly, her eyes begging for her not to continue with her interrogation. “H-how is Jess doing?” 

“Great her and Josh are doing great, and Ashley is excelling in school.”

“That’s great.”

Edna’s gaze stayed indifferent upon Abigail, making it feel as if a lit match had been placed upon her skin leaving behind its searing and burning pain: “Do you even care Abigail? Because last time I checked you haven’t seen or even spoken to your sister since her daughter was born. And that was eight years ago.”

“Of course I care!” Abigail yelled as she smacked her hand down on the table causing a small tingle of pain to flow throughout her arm. “You think that I separate myself and my family from you guys because I don’t care. I do it specifically because I care. Because I have gotten myself into some deep shit over the years and am afraid of what it will do to you and to Jess and even to little Ashley.”

Edna moved from her place behind the counter, moving towards her daughter, her hands raising up to rest on her cheeks: “Then talk to me love, let me help you.”

“That’s the issue mom. You can’t.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Mom, just drop it, please. I don’t want to get anyone else involved.”

“Does this mean that Maxine is involved in whatever this is?”

Abigail looked into her mother’s eyes, searching for some kind of clue as to what was going on inside of the others' head, but the only thing that she could decipher from the foreign look was worry, a common friend of hers: “Inadvertently yes.”

“Does she know?”

“She knows nothing about anything,” Abigail replied as she rubbed at the small black marking that lay upon her wrist. “And I don’t plan on her figuring it out either.”

“She will eventually,” Edna replied rubbing her hand supportively on Abigail’s cheek and then pulling her hand back and moving back to her place in front of her massacred pineapple. 

“Not if I have anything to do with it,” Abigail replied, her voice seeming to falter slightly.

“Have anything to do with what?” Max said from the archway that connects the living room and kitchen together.

“Nothing love,” Abigail replied forcing a smile to rise out from its hiding hole within her and join her other facial features to make her seem as if she was that joyful loving mother she had always been. “Now come on give your grandma a kiss goodbye we got to go.”

Electric blue eyes gazed out and into the darkness of night, watching as the dots of light emanating from the street lights above blurred together as they drove their way towards home. Trees lurking beyond the thin metal rails that separate the road of fast cars from the one of the beauty of nature; the trees were almost completely bare in the coldness of late November, but still holding onto their few final shreds of red and orange life that keep them in consciousness.

Abigail turned her head towards Maxineś small form, her head placed against the window as she stared beyond the glass of the car window and out into the world around her; watching as if it was her first time seeing it.

“Hey love,” Abigail said disrupting the quiet but steady sound of the radio and causing Maxine to move away from the glass slightly. “I bought the stuff to make your favorite cake, so when we get home I thought we could make that and then watch whatever movie you want. Does that sound good? Because if not we could do something else.”

“As long as I can eat the leftover batter in the bowl,” Maxine replied with a smirk.

“Okay,” Abigail replied her voiced heightened in a specific way as if to mock her. “But if you get sick it’s not my fault.”

“It would be entirely your fault,” Maxine replied her smile widening. “And you know it.”

“Okay fine, whatever, but you’re going to school tomorrow no matter what.”

“And I will,” Max replied. “I promise.”

Abigail turned the wheel to the right and Maxine watched as they left behind all of the bright yellow light that gave the highway a kind of golden aura and began to near their house. 

Once the small silver car was close enough to their address to where they could see their driveway Maxine noticed another car in their driveway, one that she hadn’t seen in months and of whom the owner she hadn’t seen longer.

“Is that dad's car?” Maxine asked her mother, her body suddenly fueled by her newfound excitement.

“Yes, it is,” Abigail replied. Her eyes seemed to be filled with something that Maxine hadn’t seen before. Something that scared her.

“Are you okay?”

“Yes,” Abigail replied he breath slightly shaking. “I'm fine, sorry I was just surprised.”

The second that small vehicle was beyond the end of the driveway Maxine unbuckled herself and was basically leaping out of the car before it even came to a full stop, completely ignoring the protests of her mother. Abigail pulled her keys out of the ignition and leaned back in the seat of her car, her head moving up towards the ceiling, letting out a breath that she hadn't known she was holding. 

_ Tap. tap. Tap. _

Abigail leaped out of her seat startled at the unexpected noise. Her eyes met ones of which matched Maxine’s, except on Jordan Walker they were more like ice and held a certain unplaceable coldness to them. Abigail moved her hand to the car door handle and pushed herself out of the warm car.

“Sorry, I must’ve spaced out,” Abigail said once she was face to face with her husband.

“I’ve missed you,” he replied as he pulled her into his open arms. Abigail could see Maxine waving from inside his car.

“Are we going somewhere,” she asked.

“Well I got some extra cash so I thought that we could bring Maxine to that diner she loves so much,” Jordan replied with a large smile that seemed almost unnatural.

“That’s like two hours away,” Abigail replied her voice changing from its normal pitch to one that held more of a type of sternness to it. “She has school tomorrow and it’s late we are not driving for four hours.”

“We wouldn’t be driving,” Jordan replied his smile turning more into a smirk. “I would be.”

Abigail looked right into his cold blue eyes: “She has school tomorrow. So no your not.”

“It’s her first birthday that I’ve been here for in years,” Jordan pleaded. “Please.”

“Fine,” Abigail caved. “But she’s sleeping in the car and that’s final.”

Electric blue eyes stared out beyond the glass, yet again glued to the large streetlights above just as before, although this time the emanating light shone brighter, giving everything around them a glowing aura; making everything seem as if was from another distant world. Light after light passed by them, the speed of which their car was accelerating making them all join together as one long stream of light, one line of glowing glory. She tried to keep count of them as they passed on, but the second they were out of her sight a new one came into view and within seconds she lost count. Maxine didn’t have a clue as to how long they had been going down this seemingly endless road, all she knew was that they had passed over a hundred or so lights and her head was starting to ache, she turned away from the window to look up at her parents in the front. 

Abigail’s platinum blond hair cascaded down her face like a waterfall covering the little details on her face and hiding them from the view of the young child's eyes in the back. Her usual bright emerald green eyes stared blankly out of her window, and it was as if every little thing that had happened over the course of Abigail's life had been erased. Like she was just some character whose story was literally highlighted and deleted, never to be heard of by the world. What was left was a mere image of a person whom of which had been left in the past, never to be seen again.

The screaming sound of rubber as it fought against the pavement below tore through the silence that had been held for so long in the little silver car. Maxine’s eyes widened in horror as the red front a semi-truck came hurtling towards the car.

Time slowed.

Milliseconds turned to minutes.

Seconds turned to hours.

And  _ one minute _ felt like an eternity.

_ One minute _ that changed the course of Maxine Walker’s life forever. _ One minute _ that looked into her innocent blue eyes and took their virginity.  _ One minute  _ that stole the lives of the two people that she loved most in the world.  _ One minute  _ to say her goodbyes.  _ One minute _ to remember. And  _ one minute _ to her eternal suffering.


	2. Chapter 1

**CHAPTER 1: Monday, June 3, 2019**

Bright golden rays of sunlight shown through the large, white, six-paneled window the thin form of Max Walker sat curled upon a soft black bean bag next to the window, causing a sort of aural glow around her. She held her favorite book in her hand, its page corners reaching out to her from wear as her eyes scanned the words on the page in front of her. The words were something so common to her and yet she couldn’t get enough of their familiarity that they held or the comfort that they supplied. When she lost her parents she also lost herself, it was as if she was an old PC computer that had its cord pulled, she just couldn’t function beyond her tears. Books were her getaway. They supplied an alternate reality to the hellish one she was trapped in on a daily. A place that she could transport herself to. Where she could forget all about the accident and just be part of the new story unfolding around her. Although, these realities only lasted so long, after a certain amount of time there was no story left and that reality became just as dead as her parents.

Max could hear footsteps nearing her door, their sound almost silent to a point that it seemed that she had imagined the noise in the first place. That is until she heard a knock at her door that was slightly louder than that of the footsteps of the person on the other side of the door.

“Max,” said the voice of her cousin Ashley. “Are you awake?”

Max’s lips curled up slightly at her question as she got up from her glowing spot to move towards the door on the opposite side of the room, deciding to crawl over her bed instead of walking around it, making her excursion more difficult than needed. Almost completely off of the bed Max’s foot got tangled in her pile of soft blankets that cover her plain, gray sheets, causing her body to tumble towards the carpeted ground below her; a loud crash resonating throughout the small room followed by a sudden deep laughter that was reeled out of Max’s body like a fish yanked from a pond.

Max could hear the quiet voice of Ashley beyond the door as the handle started to turn, “Guess that answers my question.”

“Sorry,” Max breathed out still on the floor. “I was going to open the door.”

Ashley looked down at her cousin as she lay on the floor below her, a genuine smile upon her visage, something of which she rarely got the sight of. 

“I would join you,” Ashley said her facial features mirroring that of the one below her. “But my mom wants us down for lunch.”

Max positioned her body so that she was sitting up, her arms on the ground behind her back to carry her weight while her knees where slightly bridged, “We never eat lunch together.”

“It’s apparently important,” Ashley replied whilst putting out a hand for Max. “Come on the floor will still be here for you when you get back.”

“Haha, you’re so funny,” Max replied sarcastically.

Ashley turned her head up and smiled at Max, looking like an over-enthusiastic toddler, “Thank you for finally noticing.”

“Oh come on you dork, let's just get downstairs.”

Minutes later, both Max and Ashley were sat down on the comfortable cushioned seats that surrounded their white table in the kitchen, around them were both of Ashley's parents, Jess rushing to finish whatever food that it was left in the pan sitting on the stove, and Josh separating all of the food into their own designated dishes before moving them over to sit in the middle of the table.

“I thought we were eating lunch,” Ashley stated as her eyes wandered over the plethora of breakfast food that her mom had made.

“We are,” Jess replied coming over with a steaming plate of eggs in her hand and setting it down with the rest of the food. “You’re dad just preferred breakfast over a simple grilled cheese, always wanting to be a pain.”

“Sorry,” he replied as he shoveled a huge amount of the fluffy, light-yellow, scrambled eggs onto his already large mound of food that lay on his plate.

“It’s fine,” Jess replied. “At least you helped.”

“Sorry to interrupt your domesticity,” Max said whilst poking at her own small amount of eggs. “But why exactly did you want us to come down? We never eat together. Ever.”

“Well, you’re dad—”

“You mean Josh?” Max asked more as a statement, interrupting Jess. “My dad's dead.”

“Sorry,” Jess replied looking down at her plate. “ _ Josh  _ said that there was something that came in the mail for you two,” 

“Right! Sorry,” he said with food falling out of his mouth, fumbling to retrieve something out of his work bag that was hanging on his chair. He pulled out two slightly crumpled envelopes and motioned them towards the girls for them to take.

“What’s RAA stand for?” Ashley asked as she was reading the senders' address.

“Let me see it,” Jess commanded as she reached her hand over towards Ashley, opening it up for her to pass on the envelope.

“Here” Ashley obliged.

“Thank you,” Jess replied as she ripped the envelope open to reveal a letter, but not simply just any letter, an acceptance letter of which had words that were so achingly familiar to her. “Can you girls go upstairs, please? I need to talk to Josh. Alone.”

“Can I at least have my letter back?” Ashley asked with her palm open in front of her mother.

Jess moved the letter away from her daughter’s actions: “No. Go upstairs please.”

“So Max gets to keep her letter but I don’t,” Ashley replied, her arms flashing towards where Max sat with her letter still sat in front of her. “Thanks a lot, mom.”

Jess watched as her daughter bounded out of the room, her feet heavily hitting the ground causing tiny vibrations to follow after each step; Max’s eyes bounced between Jess and Ashley’s dissipating figure, and in one swift motion she suddenly stood up, snatching her unopened envelope, and followed Ashley out of the room. Matching Max’s speed Jess threw out one of her hands, wrapping her sweaty palm around Max’s upper arm and holding the girl back.

“Give me the letter,” Jess commanded to the dark-haired girl who was tugging her arm away from Jess’ iron grasp. “Now.”

Max moved towards the table and smacked the envelope down onto the table, its opening flap face down: “Here. You happy?”

Jess let go of Max’s arm and pulled towards herself to keep it from the other girl’s proximity: “Thank you.”

“Whatever,” Max replied turning away from the women and following the same route that Ashley had earlier gone through, except her footsteps shook the ground slightly more with every step.

“I’m sorry,” Jess muttered to herself, her grip tightening around Ashley’s letter, its corners starting to bend into themselves. 

An almost complete silence fell upon the ones left in the room, only the quiet humming of the two parents' breaths were left to disturb the possibility of complete and utter silence. Josh placed his head into his hands and rubbed at his face, pushing his nose down until he could feel the bone beneath his skin.

“What the hell Jess?” Josh said, breaking the somewhat silence while leaving his hands clasped together and resting on his face, both his thumbs pushing up against his chin and his two index fingers pushed against the tip of his nose pointing up towards the ceiling above.

“They can’t read these letters," she replied whilst still holding onto the letter that she had taken from Ashley.

“Why not?” he asked, frustration becoming evident in his voice. “What in them could possibly be so bad.”

Her emerald green eyes that matched her own daughters stared right into the ones of her husband as she threw the letter for him to catch: “Read it yourself.”

Max slowly stepped into the familiarly bright room that had always belonged to Ashley, to find said girl laying on her bed, her eyes lacking their usual lightheartedness and being left seemingly completely empty, it was as if her usually bright, and hopeful emerald orbs had fallen into the nothingness that Max was so familiar with leaving nothing but grey. 

Her mind reeling, Max didn’t notice when her own electric blue eyes met the emerald green of Ashley’s, of whom shifted over slightly to make space for Max that she slid into within a few seconds.

“I’ve got something for you,” Max said whilst reaching into the pocket of her sweatpants pulling out a letter.

The left side of Ashley’s mouth curled up into a smile: “How did you take this without her noticing?”

“I literally just pulled the letter out of the envelope when I got up and then gave her the empty envelope,” Max replied with a chuckle as she passed the crumpled paper over to Ashley. “Here you read it, I know you wanted to.”

Ashley took the paper from her grasp: “Thank you.”

“No problem,” Max replied. “Plus if I didn’t find a way to keep it you would’ve bitched about it forever.”

“Shut up! I would not have!” Ashley replied whilst playfully hitting Max on her shoulder. “Do you want me to read this or not?”

“Oh, please do, I’m so sorry for interrupting you,” Max Said with a smile, of which received her yet another hit.

“We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted into the Ragan Academy for Adolescent Academics (RAAA) on a completely free scholarship for our year-round schooling. Our school consists of two mandatory years and two more optional years that are available to better prepare for college. Our academy also has on-campus dorms that the students are required to stay in and will be assigned to at the beginning of their first semester. Longer breaks will occur more frequently to compensate for the loss of a three-month summer break. If you are interested in attending our 2019-2020 school year, please come to our informational open house on Saturday, July 27th. We hope to see you there!”

“Wait so you’re telling me that Jess was freaking out about the fact that we got free scholarships into a school,” Max said bluntly. “That makes no sense.”

Ashley jumped up from her place on the bed, placing the letter in her lap as she crossed her legs, she looked over to Max with a smirk on her face: “I don’t care what my mom thinks, we are going to that meeting.”

“And how the hell are you going to make that happen?” Max asked as she moved to sit up in the same position as Ashley.

“I don’t know yet, but I’ll figure it out.”

Setting the letter down in front of him, Josh looked up to meet his wife's eyes that held a foreign expression in them that he didn’t know how to process.

“I don’t get it,” he said. “It’s just a school.”

“It’s not _ just _ a school Josh,” she replied, an annoyed undertone hidden within her voice. “It’s the one my sister went to.”

“Okay?”

“Okay? Seriously?”

“What do you want me to say Jess, I don’t get why this is a big deal.”

“After my sister went to that damn school, she never spoke to any of us again. She just packed up a bag and left,” Jess replied, her voice already telling that she didn’t know the reason for her sisters' disappearance. “And I don’t want that to happen with Ashley and Max. I can’t lose them like I lost her.”

“You’re not going to lose them,” Josh replied, reaching a free hand out to his wife for her to hold onto for support. 

“You don’t know that," she replied. “And I’m not risking it. They are not going to know a thing about that school.”

“And what will you tell them when they ask about the letters?”

“Spam mail?” she shrugged. “I don’t know. I’ll figure something out.”


	3. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER 2: Friday, June 7, 2019**

Short fingers weaved in between the space between curls as Alexa tried to tame her chin-length head of hazel brown hair without tearing out each and every follicle in frustration. Her deep green eyes, of which seemingly held a brown undertone, stared at her mirrored reflection, their blue outer rings helping to keep their large round shape as they rampantly followed every movement the girl, of whom had the most beautiful golden brown skin, made. Once there was no longer a single strand out of place, meaning her curls were still utterly out of control, but none were sticking straight up towards the sky, Alexa decided to leave her bathroom, while her multicolored eyes waved a short goodbye to their own mirrored selves. 

The slight buzzing sound of her phone vibrating on where she left it on her nightstand resonated throughout her messy room; she quickly moved towards its buzzing noise, nearly falling to the floor in the process because of the mounds of clothes that lay upon her hard floor.

**Michael 12:23**

My moms letting me borrow the car for the day so I’ll be over in like 10 minutes

**Alexa 12:24**

Okay I’ll check with Lucas to see if he wants to come

It’ll probably still be a no though

**Michael 12:25**

One day he’ll come with us

He’s just not ready yet

**Alexa 12:26**

Will he ever be?

It’s been 2 years now

**Michael 12:27**

Actually it’s been 3

It’s the 7th remember

Plus time doesn’t matter in this situation

He might not ever be ready

**Alexa 12:27**

Hold on I just realized something

Are you driving??

**Michael 12:28**

No because I knew you’d be on my ass about it if I were

But I’m going to be driving in like 2 seconds so I’ll text you when I get to your house

Its screen now black Alexa threw her phone onto her bed, of which is equally messy—maybe worse—to the floor; she didn’t bother to try and reply to Michael’s message knowing that it would just cause him to stress about it the whole drive. Instead of answering him she decided to throw on a pair of shorts, some old T-shirt that she had stolen from her brother because it was comfortable, and her aging black and white high top Vans. Transferring her phone from its nest on the bed to the tight pocket of her shorts that could barely even be called a pocket—because women’s clothing sucks—she left her room, the door closing a lot louder than expected and causing her to jump slightly, and tapped lightly on the one opposite of her alarming the person inside before she opened the door. 

**“** Hey,” Alexa said as she trespassed beyond the door frame, watching as her brother rolled over, while under the blankets of his bed so that he could face her. “I didn’t wake you, did I?”

“Nope,” Lucas replied, his palest of white hand moving up his face to rub at his electric blue eyes, it was almost as if he was digging for treasure in there. “I just couldn’t sleep, like at all, last night.”

“Is everything okay with you?” Alexa asked, worry the main component of her current visage as she sat down on the empty space by Lucas’s feet.

Lucas looked up at his sister and repositioned himself so that he was sitting up in his place on his bed and facing her, “Well based on the fact that it's June seventh, no.”

“Right,” Alexa replied, her head shaking slightly and bowing down towards the ground. “Well, Michael is going to be here anytime now to pick me up so that we can see Will. Do you want to come with us?”

Lucas stared right into Alexa’s own green eyes, his although help up a sort of defense that both hid all emotion and yet showed it all at the same time. “No. I can’t.”

“Lucas,” Alexa said placing one of her hands on his own. “Are you sure? I mean it’s been two—well three—years now.”

“I’m sure,” he replied, his voice quieter than usual. “It’s just if I don’t go, then I can pretend that everything is normal and that nothing happened.”

“You can’t hide from it forever,” Alexa said tightening her grip on his hand and placing her other one on top.

“I know,” he admitted. “But for now, I’m okay with hiding.”

Alexa nodded at him and loosened her tight hold on his hand. “Okay, well is there at least anything you want me to say to him?”

Lucas’ head fell and his eyes refused to leave their fixated spot on his sock covered feet. “Just that I’m sorry.”

Alexa tilted her head to the side and stared at her brother’s form, he sat cross-legged with the corner of one of his blankets grasping at his left leg—and nearly falling off—his arms lay on top of his thighs while his hands clasped at each other, floating over the unoccupied air space between Lucas’ legs and his lower body. Usually, this position seemed more relaxed and comfortable, but in that moment, he seemed as if he were a stone statue that was void of any emotion and just stared off into the wondrous universe that was in his lap. 

_ Ding _

Lucas was no longer a motionless statue as he slightly jumped at the quiet sound of Alexa’s phone: “Is Michael here?”

Alexa looked down at the bright screen of her phone, the green icon that means she has a message staring right up at her: “Yeah.”

Eyes moved away from their old home to focus their attention onto Alexa as she pushed herself up from where she had earlier sat down on the bed: “Can you tell him ‘hi’ for me please?”

Alexa turned towards him, her lips curling up into a small smile: “of course.” She turned her body towards the door that she had gone through earlier.

Michael’s long, beige-colored fingers drummed against his black steering wheel following along to the words from the song “Bandito _ ”  _ by Twenty One Pilots. He glanced down at his phone screen for what felt like the hundredth time, to see if Alexa had answered him yet—she had not—he leaned his head back onto the headrest of his seat and let out a breath: “What is taking so long?” 

As if on cue the light tapping sound of Alexa’s dark fingers making contact with the glass of his car window broke through the loud music and into Michael’s ears. Michael looked up at his best friend and directed his gaze towards the little plug on the door that stated that the car was in fact unlocked. 

She nodded at his gesture and pulled open the red door: “Sorry I took so long, I couldn’t find my wallet.”

“You’re fine,” Michael replied. “Plus I could’ve always paid.”

“Uh, no you couldn’t have because you and I both know that I would never let you.”

“Lucas isn’t coming right?” Michael asked as he geared the car into drive and began to pull away from her house. 

Alexa tilted her head in his direction: “Take a guess.”

“As I said,” Michael began while momentarily taking his eyes off of the car-less road to look over at her. “He’ll come when he’s ready. Did he give you any reason why this time?”

She shook her head: “No, he just said that if he doesn’t go he can pretend that it never happened in the first place.”

“I wish it never did happen,” Michael replied, the volume of his voice lowering slightly.

Alexa placed her left hand onto his shoulder, squeezing it slightly: “Me too.”

“Are we still stopping at that cake place?” He asked once she had pulled her hand away.

“Of course, we always do” Alexa replied, she turned her attention over to the radio and reached out to raise the volume slightly. “Is this Twenty One Pilots?”

“Yeah,” Michael replied, his fingers drumming against the steering wheel again. “He’s the one that showed me them.”

“Will?” Alexa asked bewildered.

“Yeah, he loved them,” Michael answered, a small grin appearing on his face. “They were his favorite band.”

“It just doesn’t sound anything like him.”

“I know right? Just wait, here take my phone,” Michael replied whilst passing her his phone. “Go to my music and type ‘Holding on to You’ by Twenty One Pilots, it was his favorite. Literally, he made his dad play it on repeat on the ride to school for like a month straight.”

Alexa looked down at his phone, a nearly inaudible giggle resonated throughout the small space of the car, “now that sounds more like Will.”

Long blades of dark green grass were being shoved deep into the ground as the bottom of Alexa’s black and white Vans came into brutal contact with their fragile green figures. Beside the flattened footprints of grass were a variety of different stones that all held different names and messages the latter of which were often a quote or a bible verse. The brutal stepping of the black and white Vans stopped their attack on their green opponents beneath them as both Alexa and Michael came to a stop in front of one of the stone structures.

**IN LOVING MEMORY OF**

**WILLIAM JOSEPH MARINTOWER**

**BORN JUNE 7, 2002**

**DIED JUNE 7, 2016**

**AGE 14**

**A WONDERFUL BOY GONE TOO SOON**

Alexa grabbed onto Michaels' hand as her other hand that was occupied with holding the flowers that they had bought on their way there, Michaels’ opposite hand gripped onto the small box of Wills favorite cupcakes, red velvet—the same kind that they had bought for the last two birthdays they’ve celebrated without him—that came from a small bakery not that far away from Alexa’s house.

“It never gets easier does it?” Alexa asked as she wiped at the tears that were leaking out of her eyes like a broken pipe with her flower-filled hand, causing a stray flower to break off from his stem and fall down to the grass beneath, some of its more delicate outer petals to sink between the spaces provided by the tall blades of grass surrounding it.

“I don’t know,” Michael confessed, he gently pulled his hand free from Alexa’s grasp and balanced the small box of cupcakes on the ledge of Will’s gravestone; with both of his hands now free he reached for the backpack strap that weighed down his right shoulder and tugged it off from its home on the cloth of his T-shirt. He set the worn bag onto an empty spot in the grass and pulled out a blanket that would be big enough for both of them to lay on, he also pulled out two small pillows that were barely even the size of their heads, and  _ The Death Cure  _ by James Dashner, the third book from Will’s favorite series. Every year Michael would bring one of these books and they would always start and finish the entire thing in one day, both Alexa and him taking turns reading it aloud as if Will was sitting somewhere nearby listening. While Michael was setting up their space for the day, Alexa moved closer to Will’s gravestone and placed down the same mixed color arrangement of zinnia flowers that they bought every year for him. Zinnia flowers symbolize many different things based on the color of flower that you get, but if you get a mixture of all of the colors its supposed to mean that you’re thinking of an absent friend, and ever since Alexa read that online three years ago she couldn’t think of a different flower arrangement to bring him on his birthday.

Alexa stood up from her crouched place right in front of Will’s grave and turned to see Michael sitting on their blanket and staring blankly at the gray stone in front of him.

“I see you brought the book,” she said contently as she plopped down in the empty space next to Michael.

“I would never forget it,” he replied with a smile as he ran his finger up the side of the book causing the pages to flip rapidly causing an indescribable noise.

“Once we finish this series what should we bring?” Alexa asked.

“I don’t know,” Michael replied. “But we still have the two prequels after this.”

Alexa looked down at her hands that were messing with a stray piece of grass that she had earlier pulled when she sat down: “Do you know of any of his other favorite books?”

Michael shook his head: “He usually only talked about them to Lucas.”

Alexa chuckled at that, “Right, Lucas Haroltin one of the only teenagers whose room is literally an entire library.”

“I forgot about that,” he muttered. “I haven’t really talked to him since Will’s funeral.”

“Oh!” Alexa suddenly exclaimed very loudly, causing Michael to jolt slightly in his place, the book falling out of his grasp. “Sorry. Um, Lucas told me to tell you he said ‘hi’, I had completely forgotten.”

“While that’s nice, you didn’t need to give me a heart attack over it,” Michael chortled.

Alexa hit him on the arm playfully: “You’re fine princess. Now can I have the book we’ve got some time to kill and I actually feel like reading for once.”

Michael grabbed the book from its place by his foot, its corners curled up from him messing with them, and passed it over to Alexa, he looked down at her right wrist as her hand wrapped around the spin of the novel and noticed the dark black mark that was etched onto her skin.

“Did you ever tell your mom about that?” he asked her whilst motioning towards the dark mark with his hand.

Alexa’s left hand moved over to rub over the black lettering as if it itched: “Yeah, but as always she wouldn’t tell me anything about it.”

“Just like the thing with that school,” Michael replied.

“Yeah,” Alexa said. “I just don’t get why both she and my dad are so weird about it. I mean if you had some random letters appear onto your skin on your seventeenth birthday you’d want some answers too.”

“Do you think they're connected?”

“I don’t know what to think anymore,” she confessed, grabbing the book from where she had earlier placed it in her lap. “Can I start now? Because we could honestly speculate forever on this.” 

The horrendous sound of blasting trap-rap music resonated throughout the teenager filled house, bright flashing lights burning into the light brown iris’ of Connor Mineard as he sat on the third step of the stairs that was off more in the corner of the room away from all of the pungent smell of sweat and alcohol. The constant flashing lights had been penetrating his pupils for hours at this point and Connor was tired of it. His head felt like it was going to explode. It didn't help that every single little in and out of color that those goddamn lights were making brought on old memories of the same day from years past.

_ Flash _

His own little fourteen-year-old feet hitting the dirt path as he ran along.

_ Flash _

One of his closest friends running ahead of him.

_ Flash _

The sound of a shoe hitting rock.

_ Flash _

Watching as his friends’ feet lost balance and he began to tumble towards the steep ledge adjacent to him.

_ Flash _

The high pitch sound of his friends' voice crying out to him: “CONNOR!”

_ Flash _

His fourteen-year-old feet left completely still.

_ Flash _

He felt as if he were unable to move.

_ Flash _

He just stood there and watched as Will’s nimble hands were losing their grip on the dirt earth below him.

_ Flash _

The rest of his friends appearing just as the ends Will’s fingers slipped.

_ Flash _

All of them rush to try and save him.

_ Flash _

But Connor stood motionless. 

“Dude, What the hell are you doing over here?” a guy by the name of Mason asked, causing Connor’s body to jolt suddenly at the intrusion of his thoughts. “Come on there’s girls and alcohol.”

“I’m good Mason,” Connor replied, noticing that his hands were shaking he pushed one up into his hair while the other gripped tightly to his forearm, acting as a protective barrier between him and the outside world.

“What is wrong with you today?” Mason asked, his eyebrows scrunching up in confusion.

“Nothing,” Connor spat rapidly. “I’m fine.”

“Then come on,” Mason replied, using his hand that wasn’t holding a beer can to grab onto Connor’s exposed forearm and pull him up from his place on the stairs, causing Connor to accidentally tug on his own hair.

“What the fuck!” Connor exclaimed, pushing Mason’s hand away from him. “Just leave me alone.”

“What is up you?” Mason barked. 

“I said I’m fine,” Connor hissed in reply.

“You’re clearly not fine Connor. Seriously cut the bull shit.”

“You want me to cut the bull shit?” Connor asked his voice rasing slightly. “Okay. Fine, Do you know what happened today three years ago?”

Mason stared at him blankly, his eyebrows scrunching up in confusion again: “No.”

Connor shook his head: “I didn’t think so. One of my friends died three years today.”

“Fuck dude, I’m sorry I completely forgot about Will,” Mason replied, his voice completely void of any emotion. “But it’s my fault that that psychotic kid Michael didn’t do anything.”

“You’re right. It’s not. It’s my fault,” Connor statted, his voice cracking. “I’m the psychotic one that didn’t do anything. I’m the reason that he’s dead. He's dead because of me.”

“Dude, calm do—”

“Don’t tell me to calm down,” Connor demanded. “I’m out of here.”

“Connor,” Mason started as he reached out his hand towards Connor yet again.

“Don’t touch me!” Connor shouted, causing many drunk eyes to turn towards him.

Connor felt like he wasn't in control of his body; it was as if he was just the spectator and all that he could do was watch. He pushed through the people around him, ignoring their burning gazes on his back as he stumbled towards his car through the darkness of the night that enveloped him. He grabbed at the black handle and yanked it open with such force that it seemed that the damn thing was going to clatter to the ground. He pushed himself into the driver’s seat, slamming the door shut behind him, and threw his keys at the seat next to him causing them to slam against the material with a clanging sound as the metal of one key crashed against the other and then rolled off onto to the floor. Connor’s hands curled into themselves as he held them the front of his face, the back of his arms brushing against the steering wheel in front of him. At the same time that his hands curl up, his face scrunched up and his eyes started to pour water out of them, causing his wet tears to spill into his hands as his face fell forward to rest its weight on their curled figure.

In that moment it felt as if everything around him was curling in on him just as his hands had done seconds ago. Everything that he tried to forget, that he tried to push away, was all at once coming in and attacking him with full force. He could do nothing but succumb to its brutal ambush. His lungs felt as if they were on fire. His body heaved trying to grapple at any particle of air that it could, but the simple innate act of breathing became something that seemed impossible. Connor’s fingers moved up to tighten around his long black strands of hair that were on the top of his head, they pulled relentlessly as if they were trying to yank out all of his of thoughts that were running throughout his head at a hundred miles per hour. 

_ I’m gonna die.  _

This single thought replayed in his head over and over like a mantra, it became the single thing on his mind because it felt as if it was the only way to have whatever was happening to him end. But it was never going to end. This misery had become his eternity. All he wanted was to be able to catch a single breath. For everything around him to stop caving in.

_ Please make it stop. _

He begged silently to whatever out there would listen to him.

“I didn’t mean it. I didn’t mean to kill him,” Connor croaked out at an almost inaudible volume as he regained some air. “I didn’t mean it, Will.”

He sucked the sweet air into his lungs as he laid his head back to sit upon the headrest of his seat. He slowly tried to regain the rhythm of a normal breathing pattern as his hands clutched onto the steering wheel in front of him at nine and three. After a few long minutes, he felt as if he was as close to normal as he could possibly get in this situation; he leaned up in his seat, turned his car on and geared it into drive and left the teenager-filled house behind his as he drove off to the one place he had refused to visit in the past three years. 

The usually bright red of Michael’s small car was completely diluted in the dim luminance of the dark night that surrounded both him and Alexa as they pulled back into the same place where they had parked earlier, back when the sky was a bright blue and most animals were still awake.

“I can’t believe that we seriously had to go to what? Three different stores to get candles,” Michael said to Alexa as he pushed on the handle of his door to step out into the night.

“Okay, it’s not my fault that both of the Walgreens that we went to were out of the number one and seven candles,” Alexa chucked back in reply as the bag from Target crinkled loudly in her hand. “At least Target came through.”

“We should've just went there first,” Michael mumbled as both of their feet left the pavement below and placed themselves side by side in the dark grass below. “Why couldn’t we just stick with the plain candles that I had originally bought?”

“Because Will deserves the best, not just some cheap candles that you found in a drawer at home,” Alexa replied matter of factly. “You’ve got the cupcakes right?”

“Yes I have them,” He replied lifting the small white box that was in his hand up into Alexa’s view. “You know you're acting like these candles are from some royal palace, they were only like five dollars from Target.”

“You never know Target could be the palace of some secret royale family that we don’t know about,” Alexa replied as she nudged Michael with her shoulder playfully. “Plus five dollars for a single candle is still pretty expensive. Especially since they are going to get used this one time and then thrown away into the trash.”

“True,” Michael replied, the end of the word going almost completely quiet as he stopped right where he was stood, Will’s gravestone barely in view.

Alexa turned from her place that was about a step or two ahead of him: “What is it?”

Michael pointed to the gravestone that they were both too familiar with: “Is that, Connor?”

Alexa looked over to where he was pointing, there he was his knees digging deep in the grass below him as kneeled in front of Will’s stone, his mouth was moving but they were at too far of a distance to be able to decipher what he was saying: “Yeah. Um, do you want to go back to the car? We can always come back later tonight.”

“No it’s fine,” Michael replied his voice cracking slightly.

“Are you sure?” Alexa asked worriedly.

Michael nodded his head: “I think we should offer him to join us, it’ll only be for a minute or so.”

Alexa looked down at her feet and then back up to Michael with a look of seriousness that she rarely wears on her face: “Can you handle that, with everything that’s happened, that he’s done?”

Michael nodded yet again: “I think Will would like to see us together again.”

Alexa nodded back at him in understanding as she reached out to grab onto his free hand and pulled him along with her as she continued on their path. As their distance between them and the stone lessened they were slowly being able to hear Connor’s quiet words as he mumbled repeatedly: “I’m so sorry Will. I didn’t mean it. This is all my fault.”

Alexa tried to be quiet as to not disturb the boy that they hadn’t spoken to in ages in front of them, but she had completely forgotten about the plastic bag that she was carrying in her hand, of which she moved suddenly causing the bag to crinkle loudly. Connor’s body jolted as a result of the sound that cut through the eerie silence of the cemetery.

“Sorry,” Alexa said as she covered the bag with both hands as if she was trying to conceal it loud sound—it only made the noise even more pronounced.

“It’s fine,” Connor replied, hastily getting up from his place on the ground. “I’ll just go.”

“You don't have to it’s fine Connor,” Michael said from his place next to Alexa. “You have the right to mourn him just as much as we do.”

“No, I don’t want to disrupt whatever it is you guys are doing with those,” Connor said as he turned to walk away from both them and the stone.

“We were actually going to offer you to join us,” Alexa said to him, causing him to stop all previous movement. 

He turned back to face them: “Really?”

“Yeah,” Alexa nodded. “Here Michael give him a cupcake, I’ll open the candles.”

Michael lifted the top white flap of the box and pulled out a red velvet cupcake with the most perfect swirl of cream cheese frosting on top and offered it to Connor: “Every year we light candles and sing happy birthday to Will.”

Connor accepted the offer and pulled the little red cake into his grasp, cradling it as if it were a fragile child: “Just like we used to.”

Michael looked down at the open box in his hand: “Yeah, just like we used to.”

“Michael, can you pass me over a cupcake please?” Alexa asked from her place crouched down by the open Target bag, of which had a pile of, the now shredded, cardboard backing of the candle packaging. 

“Yeah here,” he replied taking out another cupcake. Alexa took it from his hold and balanced it on the top part of Will gravestone, once it was completely still and not going end up falling, she grabbed onto the smallest—yet overly expensive—number candles that they could find and placed them side by side in the thick white frosting of the cupcake to make a seventeen. Once she was happy with their placement on the cupcake she took three normal candles from the pack that Michael had given her earlier and passed two of them off to Michael and Connor. 

Michael pulled the lighter out of the back pocket of his jeans and lit all three of their candles, but before lighting Will’s he turned to Connor, “Do you want to do the honors?”

Connor simply nodded slowly as he took the lighter from Michael’s offering hand. He walked over to the cupcake atop of Wills gravestone, his hand the was holding the lighter shook as he ignited the flame and lit the two numbered candles. He took a step back from the stone and moved to stand back in his place next to Michael. Alexa looked over at both of the boys next to her and them back at the one that was no longer with them.

“ _ Happy birthday to you _ —” she began to sing a little slower than how it was usually sung.

_ “Happy birthday to you,”  _ Michael and Connor joined in.  _ “Happy Birthday dear William. Happy Birthday to you.” _


End file.
